


Popcorn

by Derbil_McDillet



Category: 30 Rock
Genre: F/F, Post-Season/Series 05 AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-25
Updated: 2020-10-31
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:34:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 5,340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26645314
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Derbil_McDillet/pseuds/Derbil_McDillet
Summary: Liz receives an unexpected invitation from her assistant.
Relationships: Liz Lemon/Cerie Xerox
Comments: 7
Kudos: 8





	1. Hooray for Popcorn!

Liz was dumbfounded when her(admittedly incredibly hot blonde) assistant made her proposition. “Cerie have you lost your flipping mind?!”, was the best response she could formulate. She shook her head.

Of all the crazy stuff she’d heard thrown around the halls of 30 Rockefeller this was...definitely in the top twenty at any rate. Had Jack really seen Walt Disney’s frozen head?

“I don’t see what the big deal is”, the aforementioned (incredibly hot blonde) assistant replied in a tone slightly more defensive then the TGS head writer was used to. “I just think it would be fun if we grabbed some dinner and saw a movie together.” She shrugged like repeating it would make it sane.

“Yeah but do you realize what most people would consider those activities put together?”  
  
“A dat-“

“A DATE CERIE!”, Liz bellowed. “You know I’m not a lesbian right? You remember Gretchen? I already tried batting for the LGBT team and it didn’t work out so well”, She paced around her tiny office, “God what is it with people making assumptions about my sexuality?”

Cerie, annoyed with how stubborn Liz was being decided to take charge, “Look neither of us have had the best luck with guys recently. That pilot tried to shoot you and Aris left me in the middle of the Black Forest so he could be with that creepy Hapsburg chick.”

Liz wrinkled her nose as she recalled the various disasters that had befallen both women earlier in the year, “Yeah there was definitely a love potion involved there if you ask me.” Cerie just nodded solemnly.

Liz sighed, “All right, one date”, she emphasized with her index finger, “but I get to choose the restaurant.”

“Deal”, Cerie beamed a brilliant smile that warmed up Liz more then she was willing to admit. “Where do you want to go?”

Now it was Liz’s turn to light up, “that popcorn place on 11th Avenue, I’ve wanted to go there for ages but no one will go with me, not even Tracy and he’s had multiple popcorn machines in his dressing room over the years.”

Cerie was excited, she honestly hadn’t expected her plan to ask her neurotic boss out for a romantic evening to go so swimmingly. “So when do you wanna go? I’m totally free tonight.”

Liz grabbed her coat, “Yeah tonight’s fine, let’s get out of here.” Cerie got up to follow with spring in her step, for the first time in a while things where going her way.

As they made there way to the elevator, Cerie realized something, “Hay Liz why are we going to a popcorn place if we’re going to the movies afterwards? Can’t you get popcorn there?”

Liz stoped, turned and met her date’s eyes with a deadly serious expression. After a beat she replied with a statement that Cerie would learn to take to heart:  
“Honey if you want to be with me you’re gonna have to learn not to question my food choices.”


	2. Yay their eating Popcorn!

“So how’s this for a first date?”, asked Liz after wolfing down another handful of popcorn from her jumbo sized mix-of-every-flavor bucket.

Cerie giggled and ate another piece from her own regular sized bag of lightly salted treats, “Definitely different, I didn’t think you could build a restaurant around a movie theater snack.”

“Hey if this is too out of your comfort zone you should probably back out now Xerox.”

Liz noticed Cerie made an odd expression at that comment, “What’s wrong? Oh no did I already mess this up? Damm this is gotta be a record, well ok there was this one time...”

Cerie realized Liz was starting to ramble and quickly intervened, “No no, you’re been great it’s just that you’re the first person from work that’s ever addressed me by my last name.”

The brunette just shrugged at this, “I guess, though it’s not like TGS has ever been a very formal workplace. I’m pretty sure Josh didn’t even ware pants most of the time but I could never tell because he was always sitting down.”

Cerie waved this off, “No it’s not that. You’ve meet my family right?”

Liz thought back, “Well I meet those cousins from Holland at Kenneth’s party way back when. Man those girls knew how to party!”

She then took note of the other patrons in the restaurant and lowered her voice, “They convinced me to try Ecstasy, don’t tell anyone.”

Cerie smiled, “oh yeah they’re pretty great but I’m not talking about Jasmijn, Veerle, Fleur, and Amy,” Liz raised a brow, but Cerie kept going, “Don’t you remember my immediate family from my wedding?”

Liz shook her head apologetically, “I’m really sorry but that whole day was kind of a blur. For some reason all the drama in my life always seems to come to a head in May.”

“It’s alright, I’d kinda like to forget it myself at this point”, Cerie composed herself as she thought best how to summarize the American side of the Xerox clan.

She began, “Ok it’s like this: my family is like old money-New York royalty rich. You know the Xerox corporation? My geart-grandfather Gerhardus founded it with some other guys.”

Liz blinked, and absorbed this information, “Wait so you’re telling me your family got rich off selling office equipment? Why is that kind of a turn on?”

“Well you always have been very into organization,” her date guessed, “Anyways my relationship with my family is a bit complicated. I’ve always been the screwup so my parents got me a job at NBC after I accidentally burnt down their French vineyard.”

Cerie paused to take a sip of her water, “They said it would help me network but I can tell it’s just so they could get me out of the way and focus on my brother Louis. He’s the family scion.”

“Ah, so you’re the Fredo,” Liz pointed out. Cerie squinted at that, “Is he in the E Street Band?”

Liz just shook her head, “Never mind it’s not important.”

Cerie resumed, “So at this point I’ve gotten used to not being reminded of my family that much when I’m at work. Honestly it’s kinda nice. I don’t have to worry about what the cast and crew think since they’re usually too busy perving on me to ask questions about my personal life.”

Liz interjected, “Well Jenna did some digging into your background once but that was just so she could try to prove you weren’t a US citizen and have you deported.”

Cerie nodded and sighed, “Wow I’m sorry to dump all that on you. It’s just nice to get that off my chest.” 

Liz waved her off, “Oh don’t worry about it. It’s nice to get to know you better. We’ve been working together for like five years now so it’s probably about time.”

Afterwards the conversation shifted to other topics like the upcoming America’s Kids Got Singing show Jenna was working on(sure to be the most watchable train wreck of the season) or the effects of the Kabletown takeover(Cerie wasn’t particularly fond of the ‘family oriented’ dress code they had implemented).

Liz had lost track of time when she checked her phone, “Oh crap we gotta go if we’re gonna get to the theater on time”.

As both women left Liz had a weird feeling. She had been shocked earlier in the evening when Cerie had first proposed going on a date. But now she was the most comfortable she had been in months after all the guns, gas leaks, and garbage pickup(not nearly as fun she initially thought it was) she had put up with it nice to just relax and go on a real date.

 _Maybe 2012 is gonna be a good year_ , Liz thought not realizing she was tempting fate.


	3. I might be overstating the importance of Popcorn in this story.

“Where you alright in there? You were kinda antsy”, Cerie asked Liz as they walked into the movie theater lobby.

The other woman shook her as she looked back at the theatre entrance. “Yeah I’m all right it’s just that Matt Damon gives me the creeps now for some reason.”

The blonde turned her head at this, “Aw really but he did so much to revitalize the zoo. Plus I thought him and ScarJo were so adorbs together!”

Liz nodded a little, “I mean yeah they have chemistry don’t get me wrong but isn’t he a little old for her?”

This particular comment caused Cerie to come to a stop near a large poster of Robert Downey Jr and Jude Law. She eyed Liz for a second before responding, “Well I sure hope you don’t feel that way about _everything”.  
  
_ Liz took a second before the gears in her head clicked, “Oh I um err... well it’s different with us.”

Cerie scrunched up her face at this, “Different how?” Now Liz was really worried. It was an unspoken rule at TGS that when even the normally easy going Cerie Xerox was angry or upset you had truly messed up.  
  
She tried thinking of an excuse before giving up, “I don’t know ok? I’m just a little nervous about this. The last time I tried the whole May-December thing it didn’t work out so well.”

Cerie softened, “You mean with the coffee guy we had a couple of years ago? You never did say why you broke up.”

Liz did a little eye roll. The last thing she wanted to do right now was dig up the graves of her romantic failures but she figured she owed Cerie an explanation, “Ok it went like this: I could handle everything else about him until I went to his apartment and I met his mom.”

Her assistant looked really curious now. Liz continued, “and she looked looked exactly like me. Clothes, hair, glasses. It was like I had met my clone and she was somehow my boyfriend’s mom. It was all too much to take so I bailed right then and there.” 

Cerie remembered more clearly now, “Yeah he didn’t take getting dumped well. One day he came in sulking and spilled our coffee orders all over Lutz.”

It was at this point she noticed some bored looking theater workers over at the snack counter watching them. She tugged on her date’s arm. “Come on let’s get out of here.

As they left one of the workers called out, “Wait I want to here more about the mom clone!”   
  
They stepped out into the chilly December evening and walked quietly to the subway station. Liz spoke up again as they neared the entrance, ”Ok look I know you’re young. You’re in your early twenties. Do you know how old I am?”

Cerie looked up as she thought about it, “Your in your thirties right?”   
  
Now Liz was getting annoyed, “Forty One Cerie! That’s a big 4-1 for you! And I’m going to be Forty Two in a few months! I was in high school dating closeted theater guys when you were born. So I’m sorry but this is pretty weird for me to be trying again.” 

They conversation died down again as they made their way threw the tolls(there was a brief issue where Liz’s MetroCard didn’t work) and onto the subway platform. They had some time to wait for the 2 Train while Cerie processed this information.

After a few minutes she finally responded, “For the record you’re nothing like my mom.” Liz blinked, “Huh? Sorry I was trying to figure how to get to the gym and change before everyone else tomorrow.”   
  
Cerie did an eye roll of her own, “Earlier when you were talking about freaking out about that guy’s mom. I can tell you this much, you’re like about a million miles away from Dominique Xerox in just about every category. I love her but sometimes I think she could eat Jenna for breakfast.” 

Liz squinted behind her glasses, “And this is supposed to make me feel better how exactly?”

Cerie waved it off, “It’s not really but what’s important is that you’re being totally ridiculous. This isn’t me working out some weird complex and this isn’t you being like those lame old guys who go to clubs and try to pick up girls like your dad did that one time.”

Liz winced. She really didn’t need to be reminded of that incident every again.   
  
“Alright fine maybe I’m overreacting, but you gotta understand I’m still a little raw from...well a lot of stuff. My love life has been pretty weird.”

Cerie grinned a little at this, “Oh and you think mine is normal? Do you remember all the Somali pirates at my wedding?”

Liz just slumped, “Ok yay that was pretty out there. They were surprisingly fun at the reception though.”   
  
At this point the subway train came barreling into the station. The conversation died down again until they reached 106 Riverside Drive. 

“Alright this is me”, Liz looked up at her building and then back at her date, “I know it got kinda weird at the end there but I really did have a nice time.”

Cerie just shrugged it off, “Ehh don’t worry I had a nice time too. Soooo...do you wanna do this again some time?”, She looked at Liz with anticipation. 

Liz gave another trademark Lemon eye roll and sigh before relenting, “Sure, you free next weekend?”

Cerie beamed at this, causing Liz to warm up again. _God I’ve got to get that under control,_ she thought.

“Also can we table any discussion about what this means for my sexuality later? Dealing with our age gap is about all I can take right now.” 

Cerie was understanding, “Yeah yeah it’s fine but there is one thing though...” She leaned in closer.

Liz realized where she was going, “Oh what the hell” and meet her halfway. As far as first kisses go it was hardly speculator end-of-the-movie-fireworks stuff. But it was respectable enough as far as Liz was concerned.

When they parted Liz backed up and took a good look at her assistant. Yes everyone knew she was attractive(she had even admitted earlier that she played this to her advantage from time to time) but this was different. She looked positively gorgeous right now in a way that went beyond just looks. It was stirring up way more feelings then she could comprehend this late.

Eventually they stopped starring at each other and Liz awkwardly pointed her thumb at the door, “I really should get to bed. I’ve got a lot going on tomorrow and I need to be somewhat well rested.”

Cerie regained her composure, “Yeah totally I’ll see you at work, and I’m gonna hold you to that second date you know.” 

As Cerie walked off Liz made her way up back to her apartment with a little more spring in her step. “Another successful interaction with a woman!”, she said to no one in particular. 


	4. Tracy is an Idiot

Liz was fuming when she stormed into Tracy Jordan’s dressing room, “You!”, she pointed at the aging comedian who was in the middle of playing Halo, “Why do you have to be so stupid?!”

Tracy paused his game, “Hey how was I supposed to know that you can’t ship uranium in the mail?”  
  
Liz was thrown off balance, “Wait where do you get...never mind it’s not important. I’m talking about that homophobic standup set you did! ‘Turned into a gay’? What the hell were you thinking?”, She pointed at the wall, “There’s hundreds of people on 48th protesting!”

Tracy just waved it off, “I don’t see what the big deal is. It’s part of my act. I don’t hold back with _anyone_ and people love me for it!”

Liz sighed, “Look I don’t know what to tell you Tray. You gotta be more careful about what you say these days especially on topics like this. The gay community isn’t some abstraction. Do you know how many gay co workers you have?” 

She pointed at the crew members passing in the hall way, “That camera guy, that editor, that page when she’s drunk, Lutz I think, For God sakes even I’m dating a woman...” The words died in her throat and she realized what she just admitted.

Tracy looked at her with concern, “What’s wrong LL? Did a witch steal your beautiful singing voice? I knew I should have brought my protective charms to work today...wait did you say you’re dating a woman?” 

Liz was frozen was for a second as her brain went into overdrive to come up with a escape plan. Not finding any she decided to go with a vague explanation, “Ok fine over winter hiatus I started seeing someone...a _lady_ someone.”

Tracy looked really curious now. Liz continued, this time in a torrent as her nerves got to her, “And-it’s-still-really-new-and-I’m-not-sure-where-it’s-going-because-we’ve-only-been-dating-for-a-month-and-yes-we’ve-had-sex-a-couple-of-times-you-perv!”

Tracy put his hand on Liz’s shoulder and spoke with his best reassuring voice, “Wow, Wow, it’s ok LL! New love is always strange and scary. You should have seen me when I first got together with Angie. Or when Doctom met Grizz’s wife.”

Liz remembered now, “Oh yeah I forgot. How’s that going?”

Tracy shrugged, “It’s a complex situation. So anyways who’s the lucky lady?” 

Liz’s anxiety returned, she _really_ didn’t want to deal with this right now, “Oh you wouldn’t know her she goes to another school”.

Tracy ignored Liz’s wordless chiding of her self at that line. He just put his hands together and smiled, “Interesting so there’s a mystery afoot: who is Liz Lemon’s secret girlfriend?”

Liz tried to get him back on track, “No Tracy what’s important right now is that you publicly apologize so we don’t lose our sponsors and get canceled and then NBC takes what would have been our budget and directs it to whatever lame drama they think is gonna be the next Lost!”   
  
Tracy just kept smiling, “Oh I’m not worried about that because I already have a solution!”

Liz raised an eyebrow and then realized where he was going, “Oh no, no no no!”

Tracy jumped up, “Yes! My gay boss will apologize on my behalf! If those protesters see that a fellow gay is standing with me then they’ll have to back down!”

Now Liz was just annoyed again, “Look I don’t even know if I’m gay. Honestly I think I’m probably bisexual because I watched some Mythbusters last night and...”

Tracy just cut her off, “Boring! I’m gonna go see if Brain Williams wants to play frisbee. You tell me when my apology’s ready ok?”, With that Tracy breezed out of his dressing room, leaving Liz alone with herself. 

“Ah poop,” she declared as she got up to make her way back to her own office. 


	5. The Writers are Idiots

Cerie had just finished ordering lunch for the day(from some strange sea food place that Sue has promised was delicious), when Frank Rossitano made his announcement, “Wow I just got a text from Tracy, Liz finally went les!” 

No one payed attention to the shocked gasp coming from Cerie’s desk as they gave their opinions on this latest revelation.

“I knew it! You can tell by her clothes,” Lutz declared triumphantly. 

”How do we know this is accurate? Remember Tracy has a hard time distinguishing white woman,” Pete noted skeptically.

”This explains why she’s always trying to hang out, she definitely wants some of this _kut,”_ Sue felt like she was beginning to understand.

“Hmm I wonder how much this influenced the Gayberham Lincoln sketches?” Toofer wondered aloud.   
  
Meanwhile TGS’s secretary was starting to panic. _How much do they know? Will they care? They didn’t mind that much when Frank was experimenting or when Danny told us he had a boyfriend...wait where’s Danny? I haven’t seen since last spring!_ As she tried to remember what happened to the show’s third cast member the rest of the room finally noticed her silence.

Pete spoke up first, “Hey Cerie you ok? You look like Kenneth did just before Tracy hit him with a moped.”

Suddenly put on the spot with twelve sets of eyes on her Cerie responded with uncharacteristic anxiousness, “I ummmm yeah I’m good. How does Tracy know this exactly?”

Frank looked back at his phone, “Apparently Liz let it slip that she’s dating a mystery woman that she refused to name. I bet it’s that cleaning lady Jadwiga, I could definitely pick up some chemistry when they had that weird joint birthday. I gotta check with my cleaning lady sources.” Cerie tried not to think about how many of the cleaning ladies in the building he ‘knew’.

Now Toofer was curious, “I bet it’s Rachel Maddow. Did you see the way she laughed at Liz’s jokes up in the executive dining room? There’s definitely something going on there.”

As the wild guessing went on Cerie finally decided to take action, “All right enough! None of you guys are even remotely close,” She declared to the writers. 

Frank raised an eyebrow at her, “Uhh and how would you know that?”   
  
Cerie closed her eyes before she prepared to face the music, “Because you guys I’m Liz’s girlfriend!”

Now it was the writers turn to gasp. Pete took the lead again, “You! Why? I can’t believe I’m saying this about one of my closest friends but have you seen what a mess she is? She has reward cards for multiple sandwich shops. Also she just cleans herself off with wet wipes when she forgets to shower!”

He then pointed at Cerie, “And you’re like this angel who brightens up our miserable day with various sexy outfits,” he said wistfully.

“And goes along with it when we make jokes about obscure old cartoons and holds back her disgust when we eat junk food like animals,” Frank interjected.   
  
Cerie walked from behind her desk to the head of the writers table, occupying the spot Liz and Jenna used for various announcements, “Ok yeah I know this is really surprising and that we’re a strange pairing but Liz and I are really happy together. So you guys better learn to be respectful because this isn’t going away.”

Various mummers of acknowledgement came from around the table.

Frank spoke up again, “I know I already asked once but this won’t change the way you dress or eat lollipops right?

Cerie rolled her eyes, “Yes Frank nothing’s going to change that much. Me and Liz are still the same people as before.”

It was at this point that Liz Lemon herself stormed into the room.

Before she could get a word in everyone cheered, “Yay it’s the happy _echtpaar_ together!”, Sue proclaimed. 

Shocked Liz turned to her girlfriend, “You told them?” 

Cerie put a hand of Liz’s shoulder, “I’m sorry but they were going to figure out eventually. I figured I should just get it out of the way now.”

Liz shook it off, “Alright then,” she turned to her staff, “So you guys are ok with this?” 

The group just nodded.   
  
Pete had a sudden realization, “Hey isn’t this a HR problem though? Liz is Cerie’s direct supervisor and all.”

Liz just slumped. She had done her best to ignore that particular complication. The last thing she needed to deal with was Jeffrey Weinerslav right now. 


	6. Jack is Actually Pretty Smart

“Shouldn’t we be going to HR?”, Cerie asked her now outed girlfriend as they road the elevator to Floor 52.

”We will, I just think the big guy should here this from us and not the NBC grapevine,” Liz explained.

The elevator pinged and the couple stepped onto the floor.

Liz looked around and tried to soothe her nerves with an anecdote, “Remember when he saw Percy Jackson and tried to get us to call his office Mount Olympus for like two whole weeks afterward?” 

Cerie smiled and thought to herself, _I hope I don’t get fired. Where else am I going to find weirdos like this?_

Finally they reached to office of the Head of Microwave Programming and East Coast Television. _Or you can just call him Zeus. Gah! He can never know about that!,_ Liz said internally.

Gabe let them in and they finally came face to face with Jack Donaghy himself.

He smiled a little to slyly at Liz and pointed, “I know you just called me Zeus to yourself.”

Liz could only fume for a second before he continued, “I assume you’re hear to tell me about your, ahem, romantic entanglement with Cerie?”   
  
Cerie’s eyes widened at that, “Wow you are good! How’d you figure out?”

Jack was clearly enjoying himself now, “Well it wasn’t hard to spot the signs. You two have been very chummy lately. I think you’ve spoken more to each in the last two weeks then you have in the previous five years!”

Liz and Cerie glanced at each other. He had a point. 

Jack walked over to his drink stand and poured himself a scotch, “Not to mention all the not particularly platonic looking hugs and shoulder touching, teaming up during various shenanigans, and just in general exuding a loving and supportive vibe.”   
  
That part earned an ‘Aww’ from Cerie and actually touched Liz quite a bit, “Thanks Jack, that’s actually really sweet.”

He took a sip of his drink, “Also the other night I went down to your office to talk about a censor issue, You can’t make jokes Canadians anymore by the way, and saw the two of you making out.”

Both woman deflated a little. He quickly reassured them, “But I meant everything I said before.”

Liz and Cerie finally took a seat on the couch, the former eyeing Jack, “So you’re OK with this too?”, she asked curiously.

He sat down in the opposite chair, “Well I admit this does present a bit of a HR issue bit otherwise I don’t really mind. After all I’ve always had a feeling you were you know...”

”Bisexual?”, Liz offered up. 

He recalled that awkward episode from early in their relationship, “You know I should really call Gretchen Thomas with the good news at some point.”

Liz quickly shot down that suggestion, “Oh no, no, no, no. I really don’t want to deal with the awkwardness of that right now, OK?”

Jack just laughed, “I’m kidding of course! Though she might hear anyway if you do what Tracy told me about earlier.”

Cerie squinted at that, “What’s he talking about Liz?”

The good mood in the office finally collapsed. 

_Well she was going to hear about it eventually, “_ OK well you see I’m going to be making an apology on Tracy’s behalf...” 

Cerie nodded along. Not liking where this was going. 

“...Both as his boss aaannddd as a member of the LGBT community.”

Everyone was quite well Cerie absorbed the news.

Liz spoke up first, “You alright baby?”, she had never called Cerie baby before but she figured now was as good a time as any to start.   
  
Cerie finally found her voice again, “Yeah no it’s alright. If that’s what you need to do for the show then you should do it.” 

She pointed toward the door, “I should really get back down to 6H. Lunch ‘el be here pretty soon. I’ll catch up with you later OK?” 

She gave Liz a quick peck before briskly walking out the door. 

Liz watched her go and turned back to Jack, “Crap I think I just screwed up big time.”

Jack nodded, “mixing work with personal relationships is pretty risky. That’s generally why it’s frowned upon Lemon.”

Liz made her judgmental badger face at that, “But what about what you said about being OK with this!”

Jack held up his hands defensively, “And I meant it! However that doesn’t make it less risky. Every powerful man who’s pursued a relationship with their beautiful younger assistants has had to deal with this scenario Lemon.”

He got up, Liz could tell he was winding up to a lecture, “And do you know what? None of that stoped them from getting their work done. Not Don Geiss, or Lee Iacocca, or even Pablo Escobar. Lemon you’ve got got to get Cerie to understand that sometimes the job comes first.”

He grew a little quieter, “No matter many sexy appliance themed dances she offers,” He finished while looking into the middle distance, clearly lost in memory. 

Liz just made a disgusted frown at that last part. _We really need to Avery back. I’m not sure how much more of this he take,_ she thought to herself.

Luckily he didn’t seem to pick up on that with Six Sigma-or-whatever powers and finally returned to the present, “I’m sorry what were we talking about?” He asked in a slight daze. 

Liz got up finding this all to be way too uncomfortable for her, “I’m gonna go talk to Cerie about all this OK?”

Jack nodded and sat down at his desk, “Yeah that’s alright Lemon.”

Once Liz had scurried out, he called Gabe on the intercom, “Gabe I need you to get me a copy of the 1987 SEARS Annual Home Hardware and Leisure Catalog? It’s not important why.” 


	7. Jeffrey makes a deal.

“Alright so how are we feeling today?”, Jeffrey Weinerslav asked the two women seated in his office in a pleasant tone.

Neither Liz or Cerie answered. They both looked uncomfortable having to talk this out here.

Jeffrey continued, “So apparently there’s been something of a status update recently regarding your relationship status as the kids these days put it,” his attempt at humor fell flat. Cerie actually audibly sighed. 

He turned his attention to Liz, “I must say you’re quite the troublemaker Ms. Lemon. First the sexual harassment complaint, then briefly marrying your boss, and now dating a subordinate? What are you going to do next flash the crowd of The Today Show?”

Liz balked at that, “OK Jeffrey don’t you think you’re going a bit far? I have some dignity you know.”

Jeffrey put his hands up, “Alright point taken, though after the incident in which Ms. Maroney did exactly that you never know.”

He turned to Cerie, “And you Ms. Xerox,” he didn’t notice her bristle a little, “Have had some complaints as well, particularly regarding your, ahem, revealing wardrobe.”

Cerie frowned, “Can I ask what that has to do with us dating?”

“I bring it up because having multiple violations is starting to cause some concern. We might seriously have to consider terminating both of you.”

The couple looked alarmed at that.   
  
Liz spoke up first, “What? You can’t do that we’re just dating. We’re not harassing anyone!” 

Cerie concurred, “Yeah this isn’t like when Matt Lauer tried to lock me in his office! Can’t you just transfer me to a different show?”

”Yea-wait what?”, Liz tried to process the particular revelation.

Jeffrey paused while he considered Cerie’s offer, “Hmm moving you to a different show would probably be easier...OK I’ll see what I can do. However you two will need to participate in a course with Ms. Smew.”

——————————————————————-

It had taken some more hashing out but at least for today TGS‘s new First Couple had managed to avoid losing their jobs. 

They were sitting in Jack’s office sharing a drink. Cerie actually felt honored to be invited to this particular ritual.

Jack nursed a scotch, “So Lemon, What did you ultimately do about your Tracy problem?” 

Liz took another sip of her wine, “Oh I got Tracy to do the apology himself.”

Cerie looked up from her own whisky-and-coke, “Really how did you pull that off?”

Liz looked at little nervous, “Well I might have agreed to let him improve his lines for the rest of the season. God I feel sorry those poor S&P guys.”

Jack considered this for a moment, “To be honest that really isn’t much of a change from before. And how about Jenna?”

Liz looked over at Cerie who already put a finger on her nose. 

“Nerds! I really hope she’s on one of her good days. Otherwise I think we should just leave the country.”


End file.
